Let’s All Get Naked

Have you noticed a lot more nudity on television lately? Either they are showing more, or I’m just watching more TV.

Gigolos started on Showtime in April 2011 and has just been booked for its sixth season. Even though it’s alleged that the sex is simulated, at least you had to subscribe to Showtime, so hopefully you knew what you were getting.

Then there is Boardwalk Empire. I thought it was a soft porn movie when I first walked in on an episode. But again, you have to subscribe to HBO to see that.

But Hell on Wheels? That’s on the American Movie Channel…prime time…regular cable…and it has shown some pretty pornish scenes.

Naked and Afraid. This show debuted on the Discovery Channel in 2013. Each episode features two survivalists, a man and a woman, who meet each other for the first time and are sent into the wilderness for 21 days. They take off all their clothes and are dropped into some remote jungle or mountain or desert area where they must find water, food, shelter, and clothing within the environment.

Really? I mean, who does that? Did you know that EVERY insect, spider, and snake in the jungle in poisonous? How’s that working while you’re walking around naked. I mean even the local natives are wearing at least little aprons and penis shields.

Now there’s a fashion statement for ya…

Then there is Buying Naked. In this show on The Learning Channel, a nudist couple wants to buy a home. “What could go wrong?” asks a Florida real estate agent Jackie Youngblood. “We’re just mixing regular clothed people with some naked people – that’s normal, right?”

Just where is that normal? Not in my neighborhood. And interestingly, while Ms. Youngblood is herself a nudist, she remains clothed while her clients are naked. Hmmm?

And finally there is Dating Naked. This show debuted in July of this year. A naked male dater and a naked female dater meet and go on dates. I’m thinking dinner and a movie might be a little challenging. But hey, there’s always soaking in the hot tub, splashing around in the pool, and frolicking on the deserted sandy beach.

And during one of these naked frolics, the naked female dater bent over and her naked crotch area was fully exposed for several seconds. Some editor missed these few seconds and did not blur out her naked crotch area, which she claims is a violation of her contract with the show to not show exposed private parts. So even though she met the naked male dater while she was naked, and she was walking around naked in front of producers, directors, camera people, and film crew, now that several million people have possibly seen her naked crotch area for a few seconds – if they didn’t blink – she is suing VH1 for ten million dollars. Yes folks, she is “shocked, horrified and outraged to observe this intrusion into her privacy for all to see,” reads the suit. “Immediately Plaintiff became subject to ridicule by those watching… Plaintiff has suffered and continues to suffer extreme emotional distress, mental anguish, humiliation and embarrassment…”

Oh…and the guy she was dating before the show never called her again. What?!